Imposter Syndrome — When Will We Stop Comparing Ourselves?
It is a fascinating phenomenon — Imposter Syndrome. As the members of quite individualistic society, we are incredibly susceptible to in-crowd comparisons. Drenched in capitalism, we are made to believe that our value as human beings is equated to our work outputs. Whether it is how much money you make, what rank you are, how many fancy parties you get invited to by the big wigs, how many not-for-profits you are a part of.
Personally, I have always been proud of but also a victim of living at absolute mercy of value contribution. Holidays? Weekends? Eww gross. I need to make sure I contribute something to the world before the sun sets and hopefully after too. In my case work output is societal value.
What happens, however, when you measure yourself by these metrics is a never ending chase and disappointment in yourself. After all, you could do a little bit better, right? Plus there is always someone whose output is greater than yours.
Finding happiness and enough-ness in your achievements and contributions is an empty promise.
When you hear about other people’s achievements they always sound more impressive than yours because they are unfamiliar. Because it is an uncharted territory and we start idolising people we don’t even know much about.
We start valuing ourselves by how much we do not by who we are.
What brings it back to home for me is knowing that:
- Most people have imposter syndrome. I am not alone.
2. No one actually gives that many shits about you. It might sound a bit depressing but it is not. People are so deep into their own lives that no one has time to ponder too much about you and your achievements. People remember you for you, not your medals.
So.
If you are agonising about how much you need to do and how much societal coin you are worth, you could simplify your contribution to a the smallest currency of human interaction. A smile.
If you make someone smile (including yourself), you just might have sent some Universe-changing-life-altering-butterfly-effect kinda buzz. Just by making someone smile. So concentrate on that. Rest is just semantics.
